As I was in e bus reading this book my fren handed to me a few days back(thanks fren, =)),there was this portion which really spoke to me a lot. It reminded me of my last placement to which i went to in a nursing home.
In this home, most of e people you'll meet are mostly e ones who are left to care for themselves.They are either left alone with no family members, or even if they had, their "close ones" were either too busy or found em to burdensome to care for.
The "lucky" ones get themselves a second home here, wherelse e ones who do not qualify here...god knows where they are(not to be rude here, but it's e reality) but you'll be sure to find some of em around Mc Donalds/eating place serving you/helping you to clear e leftover/mess you've made just for e sole purpose of finding a living.Wats amazing about em is they're always willing to smile/respond back if we had. A desire to be accepted/loved.The irony is we feel accepted/loved in return.They'll never have/reach an age which is too "old" for em to work.
But wat really struck me was, most of e ones i've had a chance to be with would ask question like "So, when will you be leaving"..."5 weeks?"
Then proceed on to "So, you coming back to look for us"..."erm, maybe??...would luv to...if I'm free?"
"Why do everyone have to leave after we've got to know them, esp e nurses"...
This book has helped me to look at it from a whole new perspective.Never have I had seen it this way.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The title "Can You Drink The Cup" by Henri J. M. Nouwen(awesome writer).
"...This little book was written during e first few months of my sabbatical year, a year that l'Arche Daybreak gave me for my writing." :
Gordie Henry, who was a Down Syndrome, is one of e core members of e Daybreak community.
Once he said to me, "What is good about life is that you make so many friends. What is hard about life is that so many friends leave."
With this simple observation Gordie touched the place where joy and sorrow are embracing each other.As a long time member of daybreak, Gordie has many assistants come to live with him.They came from various countries, sometimes for a sumer, sometimes for a year, sometimes for many years. They all loved Gordie very much, and Gordie came to love them. Strong attachments and deep bonds of friendship developed.
But sooner or later, the assistants had to leave. Some got married, some returned to school, some lost their work permits, some looked for a new direction in life, and some discovered that community life wasn't for them. Gordie, however, stayed, and felt the intense pain of many separations.
One day, Jean Vanier, the founder of l'Arche, came to visit Daybreak. He gathered the whole community around him and said, "What questions would you most like to ask me!"Thelus one of the core members who had lived at Daybreak as long as Gordie, raised her hand and said : "Why are people leaving all the time?" Jean understood this question was not just Thelus' question but also Gordie's question and the question of all long-term Daybreak members.
He gently moved closer to her and said : "You know, Thelus, that is the most important question you can ask. Because you and many others want to make Daybreak your home, where you can feel well loved and well protected.What then does it mean when so often someone you love, and who loves you, leaves your home, sometimes for good? Why then do you have to suffer the pain of so many departures? It may feel as if people do not really love you! Because if they love you why would they leave you?"
As he was speaking, everyone looked at him very attentively. They knew this man truly understood their pain and sincerely cared for them. They wanted to hear what he had to say. With great gentleness and compassion, jean looked at everyone who was listening and said :
"You know your joy and your pain give you a mission. Those who came to live with you, from whom you received much and to whom you gave much, aren't just leaving you. You are sending them back to their schools, their homes, and their families, to bring some of the love they have lived with you. It's hard. It's painful to let them go. But when you realise that this is a mission, you will be able to send your friends to continue their journeys without losing the joy they brought you."
These simple words enter deep into our hearts because they made us look differently at what seemed such a harsh tearing apart. The cup of joy and sorrow had become the cup of salvation.
Drinking the cup of sorrow and joy is only possible when it bring us health, strength, freedom, hope, courage - new life. Nobody will drink the cup of life when it makes us sick and miserable. We can only drink it when it is a cup of salvation.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So beautifully written.
I love e part when it says "You are sending them back to their schools, their homes, and their families, to bring some of the love they have lived with you."
I've been there before. I've felt wat they might have even felt more deeply than I do. The hurt of separation. Some held their tears, knowing that they had to be strong inwardly...separation like this is common to many but it still hurts. But they have given me so much more.The inner joy that can only be filled if there's an empty cup, and it's their life.
Oneday, I hope that I'll be able to share this wonderful story with em.
A story of hope & of love-to let them know that they have a mission too.(",)
No comments:
Post a Comment